Episode Number: 1007
Episode Guest: Ari Shaffir, Bert Kreischer, and Tom Segura
Original Airdate: September 4, 2017
Episode Sponsors: Squarespace, LegalZoom, Stamps.com
Guest Bio: Joe is joined by Ari Shaffir, Bert Kreischer, and Tom Segura to discuss a new challenge.
Topics Discussed: Wheeler Walker, Jr.’s Instagram; Garth Brooks talk; “Country Boys Can Survive” song by Hank Williams, Jr.; UFC walkout songs and costumes; Akihiro Gono walks out as a woman for UFC fight video; Jason “Mayhem” Miller talk; Tom talks about Rampage Jackson; Rampage Jackson vs. Ricardo Arona slam knockout video; knowing how to fall on the ground; Joe talks about shooting Zookeeper movie; video of Joe falling off his bike in Zookeeper; stuntmen; mountain bikers; Bert talks about going downhill on a skateboard; skateboarding downhill video; Bert talks about driving a snowmobile into a lake; Eddie Griffin crashes Ferrari video; Ari talks about driving a moped; Bert talks about driving a motorcycle in a thunderstorm; Alonzo Bodden’s motorcycles; more motorcycle talk; Triumph Rocket motorcycle; people driving while using their cell phones; more motorcycle talk; the longest Bert has gone without drinking; it’s hard for Bert to not drink after shows; talk about writing material for stand-up; Bert talks about how much he drinks; Bert thinks he can run a marathon and that five hours would be easy; running on a treadmill vs. running a marathon; Bert drinks wine while running on the treadmill; Bert thinks he’s in good shape; Joe says that he’s in good shape and that Bert is not; Tom says Bert is in good shape for someone who is in terrible shape; Bert’s weight; Tom’s weight; (1:00:00) Tom proposes doing a decathlon; Bert admits he can’t go 90 days without alcohol; talk about doing a marathon; Joe ran a marathon and found it to be very difficult; Joe rants again about how running shoes are bad; Joe talks about Vibram trail shoes; Vibram class action lawsuit; rolfing; plantar fasciitis; doing pull-ups; fat shaming each other; why Bert can’t go 90 days without drinking; Bert says he doesn’t get drunk on stage; Joe says he won’t drink a fake shot; Bert gets offered a lot of shots; meet-and-greets; alcohol companies like Tito’s vodka send Bert free things; Doug Stanhope says he will not drink with Bert, but for only 30 days; drinking on airplanes; Bert got drunk for an hour-long flight; Bert takes Xanax to fly; (Ari pisses into a kombucha bottle); Bert talks about his upcoming flying schedule; corporate gigs; not wanting to let fans down; doing a cruise; fat shaming and weight loss challenge; Bert’s feet got smaller; fat guys have strong legs; SCRAM CAM alcohol monitoring device; pantyhose and garter belts; Bert likes Dancing Bear porn and downblouse porn; Curve treadmills; running up hills; Cameron Hanes talk; Cam Hanes beat Lance Armstrong in a marathon; Los Angeles river; the Salton Sea talk; Plagues and Pleasures on the Salton Sea documentary; The People’s Mayor video; Rob Ford talk; Rob Ford says he gets all the pussy he can eat at home video; who will run for president in 2020; nobody should be president; The Rock running for president; talk about The Rock; talk about their previous weight loss challenge and what they should have done; artists making Photoshops for their podcasts/comedy shows; more talk about their upcoming challenge; Joe thinks Bert will use more marijuana if he’s not drinking; Ari thinks they should be completely sober; Bert is worried about losing his party guy image; (2:00:00) Tom is worried Bert will go into withdrawal from not drinking alcohol; Joe says the guys have to do 15 days of hot yoga within 30 days; more talk about doing hot yoga; (Joe makes Ari go to the bathroom to pee); more hot yoga talk; debate about walking/running a marathon; debate about the length of time to do a marathon; Bert thinks he could easily run a 10K marathon; more talk about what the new challenge will entail; talk about how much Bert drinks on a daily basis; Dave Attell not drinking; Marc Maron on Glow Netflix show; Game of Thrones show; Ozark Netflix show; Angie Tribeca TV show; Narcos Netflix show; more Game of Thrones talk; Bert and Tom talk about Tom bombing; trying to make a joke that bombed work; more talk about bombing in a black room; more talk about their next challenge; Tom is concerned that Bert will have alcohol withdrawal; Bert’s wife thinks he has a drinking problem; bringing alcohol on a plane; an average day of drinking for Bert; Bert mixes up drinks in airport bathrooms before flights; Bert talks about flying sober and panicking; Joe thinks he should meditate to relax before flights; transcendental meditation; religious faith; the last time Bert didn’t drink for a long time; Joe fell asleep while performing oral sex on a woman; more talk about what the bet will be; people calling Bert fat; the plan is to be sober for October; more talk about how much alcohol Bert consumes on a normal day; Bert says he drinks about six doubles (12 drinks) per day and smokes weed on top of it; Bert can’t eat sushi with chopsticks after a night of drinking; Joe suggests waiting a week and doing another podcast to decide what the challenge will be; Bert feels like the podcast is turning into an intervention about his drinking; (3:00:00) more talk about how long Bert can go without drinking; Bert doesn’t think he’s an alcoholic; Bert thinks the fat shaming got out of control; Tom thinks if Bert was skinny it would ruin his brand; they will be sober during October; Kundalini yoga; will they give up weed for the challenge; 30 days of sobriety and 15 days of yoga; more debate about giving up weed; getting high and doing yoga; they think Bert should wear the SCRAM CAM; they have to stop drinking a full day before October starts; they have to do 15 full yoga sessions and can’t leave; Joe takes a Hydro Flask to yoga; (Ari has a meltdown about something and screams incoherently); Joe says they should do yoga in his new podcast studio; Joe tries to get Ari to stay in Los Angeles and not go to New York by bribing him with renting a place for him to stay and a Corvette for him to drive; Ari is going to London; what the loser of the challenge will have to do for the winner(s); who will have the hardest time quitting alcohol for October; Ari thinks Joe will have the easiest time giving up drinking; Ari is worried about passing out doing hot yoga; Joe says they can’t take breaks while doing yoga; they talk about doing a decathlon; what events will be in the decathlon; Bert thinks he would win a 100-yard dash; Joe is going to participate in the decathlon; Bert weighs 222 lbs.; Joe weighs 195 lbs.; doing cardio after smoking weed; Joe says the weight loss challenge wasn’t good because they dehydrated themselves before weighing in; Ari is worried about having to pee while doing yoga; talk about what car Ari wants Joe to rent for him; Ari wants a Toyota 4Runner, but Joe wants to get him a yellow Corvette; Joe wants to wrap the car in decals for Ari; Camero ZL1; (Ari goes pee again); Joe talks again about the Camero ZL1 and how fast it is; more debate about what they should wrap Ari’s car in; debate about decathlon events; Bert thought he was famous but Joe told him he isn’t; more talk about wrapping Ari’s car; Joe wants to get him a hot pink Camero; Joe says Ari has to wear yoga pants; Viagra isn’t banned in the Olympics; (4:00:00) more talk about what the challenges will be and what the reward will be for the winners; Bert thinks he will win; they agree they will be sober in October and do hot yoga for 15 days; Ari promotes his upcoming dates; Joe is going to shoot a new Netflix special; DrunkFatBert.com; Philadelphia; where to shoot a special; talk about comedy specials and editing; Tom promotes his dates; comedy in Denver; Bert promotes his dates.
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Podcast Video: Below is a video of The Joe Rogan Experience podcast episode #1007 available for streaming via YouTube.
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