The Joe Rogan Experience Episode 1000 with Joey Diaz and Tom Segura

Episode Number: 1000
Episode Guest: Joey Diaz and Tom Segura
Original Airdate: August 18, 2017
Episode Sponsors: Brigsby Bear, Lyft, (Joe stops reading ads and asks Jamie to play the Jocko Willink “Good” video); Onnit

Guest Bio: Joey “CoCo” Diaz is a Cuban-American stand-up comedian and actor. Joey also hosts his own podcast called The Church of What’s Happening Now. Tom Segura is a stand-up comedian and hosts his own podcast with his wife Christina Pazsitzky called Your Mom’s House.

Topics Discussed: Joey is scared of earthquakes; Joey’s cats can sense earthquakes; Tom talks about experiencing his first earthquake; Joe talks about earthquakes he’s been through; Northridge earthquake; where to go when the shit hits the fan; moving to Colorado; Tom talks about tropical storms; Joe talks about being in a rain storm; (they watch a video of a storm); north Hollywood shootout talk; there are more guns than people in the US; playing handball in prison; Catch Me If You Can movie; Americans in South America; paying taxes; student loans; Joey didn’t pay taxes for over a decade; Wesley Snipes didn’t pay his taxes; Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino didn’t pay his taxes; we should be able to say where our tax dollars go; Obama conducted himself as the best president ever; Trump talk; deception; selling things at Comic-Con and taking home garbage bags full of cash; having a code of ethics; Joe says Joey has become more relaxed as he’s become more successful; Joey wanted to do something with his life; An Officer and a Gentleman movie; Grudge Match movie; talk about Tom’s podcast; Joey shit outside and someone thought it was from a bear; Joey shit in someone’s yard and they ran over it with their car; you have to pour water on your shit in prison; Joe tells a story about Joey shitting in Las Vegas; Redban once put ketchup on one of Joey’s shits; the smell of shit; taking a shit followed by diarrhea; more Joey shit stories; going to the bathroom at a girl’s house and realizing she’s taken a shit; shitting/diarrhea at a girl’s house; sensitivity of the ass; why are hot farts bad; (1:00:00) Joey tells a story about farting on a bus; Joe’s blog about Joey’s farts; Joey tells a story about farting in someone’s face; more fart talk; Tom talks about almost being hospitalized from laughing at a Joey Diaz story; Joey tells the aforementioned story about a guy getting his dick sucked at a comedy show; Boomerang movie; Joey tells another blowjob story; Italian language and its rhythm; adjusting to another country’s language; Americans being seen as assholes when abroad; freedom fries; people are nice if you’re nice; you don’t know what someone’s going through; customer service talk; security guards; “Big” John McCarthy; doing 1000 podcasts; Joe talks about the early days of the podcast; Joey didn’t like podcasts in the early days; Joey realized the power of the internet and social media because of Dane Cook; Joey talks about seeing someone who recognized him; people give Tom and Joey things to give to Joe; throwing out old shit; The Real Man book; No Quarter: The Three Lives of Jimmy Page book; Led Zeppelin shark story; the lack of privacy today and advancement of technology; phones are a part of us; Joey talks about his iPad; Evernote; WriteRoom; the internet is good in small doses; Joe says Joey should climb in an isolation tank; Joey talks about his anxiety; Barcelona attacks; staring at our phones instead of enjoying life with our children; private schools in California charge $30,000 per year; Joey says he was a “faggy kid”; Randy Couture’s scarfs; Ryan Couture; Thai lineament; psychology and healing; placebo effect; Wim Hof talk; Joe talks about breathing exercises he does; Choke documentary; Rickson Gracie breathing video; Ginastica Natural(2:00:00) more Rickson Gracie talk; controlling your breath; Joey talks about doing Brazilian Jiu Jitsu; Bas Rutten’s O2 Trainer; doing yoga; Scott Sonnon; The Iron Sheik swinging Persian clubs; Ric Flair health problems; pro wrestler health issues; Geto Boys “Mind Playing Tricks on Me” songGeto Boys “We Can’t Be Stopped” album; Paul Wall; they talk about getting grills; gold teeth; Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan; waiting in lines for a restaurant; Franklin Barbecue; Pink’s hot dogs; New York hot dogs; Dodger Dogs; Joey talks about how hot dogs are made; grinding up people for meat meant for human consumption; Joey talks about the mafia; you don’t want to mess with Trump; Trump’s Charlottesville statement; the pressure of being president; the economy ebbs and flows; Charlottesville and Tiki torches; don’t talk about religion or politics; Joey rants about the prices of things; where does our tax money go; families can’t afford to go to a Dodger game; what’s going on with police officers today; being a police officer is difficult; we need cops; more ranting about cops; laws about filming police officers; more talk about police officers; Joey talks again about being arrested; “Argentinian Man Harasses LA Street Food Vendor, Flipping Over His Cart” article; Joey says drug cartels run food carts; (Joe leaves to piss); Star Maps movie; Joe says doing a podcast has changed him as a person; pretentious weed people; Joey’s podcast has changed him and keeps him in check; (3:00:00) (they pour a drink together); crazy white people; white people with ice cubes; guys with cigars; The Sopranos TV show; The Getaway movie; Steve McQueen; Steve McQueen and Ali MacGraw argument from The Getaway video; The Longest Yard movie; Burt Reynolds throws a woman on the ground from The Longest Yard video; police cars; Dodge Demon; Dubai is ballin’; indoor skiing in Dubai; indoor surfing in Dubai; Floyd Mayweather, Jr.’s cars; Mayweather vs. Conor McGregor talk; Joe says he’s a sucker for fights; Muhammad Ali vs. Chuck Wepner; Michael Jordan talk; Julius Erving top 10 highlights video; Michael Jordan top 10 dunks video; Clyde Drexler dunks video; Vince Carter dunks video; Roy Jones, Jr. talk; Jay Glazer’s Unbreakable gym; why are people better athletes today; white racists get DNA tests, find out they have African ancestry; X Alfonso; Joe likes music where he can’t understand the lyrics so he can focus on the music; Joey took a DNA test; Tom talks about his family’s dark past; there are Diaz people everywhere; people don’t think Tom is Hispanic or realize he can speak and understand Spanish; Joey doing comedy in both English and Spanish; more talk about speaking Spanish; Jim Morrison getting arrested for pretending to masturbate; more talk about pretending to jerk off; Joe thanks everyone who has ever been on the show and those of us who listen to it.


Books Mentioned

These are the books that were mentioned and/or recommended during this episode:

The Real Man

Anything & Everything - Paperback - English

No new offers available
Sale
No Quarter: The Three Lives of Jimmy Page

Martin Power - Overlook-Omnibus - Edition no. 1 (11/15/2016) - Hardcover: 624 pages

$35.00 - $10.07 $24.93

Movies Mentioned

These are the movies that were mentioned and/or recommended during this episode:

Catch Me If You Can

Dreamworks (01/27/2013) - Amazon Video, PG-13 (Parents Strongly Cautioned) - Running time: 140 min - Leonardo DiCaprio, Tom Hanks, Christopher Walken, Martin Sheen, Nathalie Baye - English

Available on Amazon Video
An Officer and a Gentleman [Blu-ray]

WarnerBrothers (05/07/2013) - Blu-ray, R (Restricted) - Running time: 124 min - Richard Gere, Debra Winger, Louis Gossett Jr., David Keith, Robert Loggia - English

$8.95
Grudge Match

Warner Bros. (02/14/2014) - Amazon Video, PG-13 (Parents Strongly Cautioned) - Running time: 113 min - Robert De Niro, Sylvester Stallone, Kim Basinger, Kevin Hart, Alan Arkin - English

Available on Amazon Video
Boomerang

Paramount (05/01/2012) - Amazon Video, R (Restricted) - Running time: 116 min - Eddie Murphy, Robin Givens, Halle Berry, David Alan Grier, Martin Lawrence - English

Available on Amazon Video
Rickson Gracie: Choke

Manga Video (05/30/2000) - DVD, Unrated (Not Rated) - Running time: 98 min - Dale Cook, Wayne Emons, Gerard Gordeau, Helio Gracie, Kim Gracie - English

$109.99
Star Maps

20th Century Fox (12/09/2008) - Amazon Video, R (Restricted) - Running time: 88 min - Douglas Spain, Efrain Figueroa, Kandeyce Jorden, Martha Velez, Lysa Flores - English

Available on Amazon Video
The Getaway

Warner Bros. (02/01/2014) - Amazon Video, R (Restricted) - Running time: 122 min - Steve McQueen, Ali MacGraw, Ben Johnson, Sally Struthers, Al Lettieri - English

Available on Amazon Video
The Longest Yard (1974)

Paramount (05/01/2012) - Amazon Video, R (Restricted) - Running time: 121 min - Burt Reynolds, Eddie Albert, Ed Lauter, Michael Conrad, James Hampton - English

Available on Amazon Video

TV Shows Mentioned

These are the TV shows that were mentioned and/or recommended during this episode:

Sale
The Sopranos: The Complete Series (Blu-ray + Digital HD)

HBO Home Entertainment (11/04/2014) - Blu-ray, Unrated (Not Rated) - Running time: 4980 min - Various - English, Dutch, German, Spanish, French

$178.94 - $66.94 $112.00

Products Mentioned

These are the products that were mentioned and/or recommended during this episode:


Podcast Video: Below is a video of The Joe Rogan Experience podcast episode #1000 available for streaming via YouTube.

Podcast Audio: Audio for this episode of The Joe Rogan Experience podcast is available through iTunes, Stitcher, or you can download the MP3 directly to add it to the audio player of your choice.